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Bobby Kotick Announces New Apology Letters Will Be Written by Alternating Teams at Treyarch and Infinity Ward Each Year for Foreseeable Future


SANTA MONICA, Calif. — Following a massive employee strike at Activision Blizzard due to years of harsh treatment and sexual harassment, Bobby Kotick has written a letter to employees to apologize for the company’s actions and announce that a new apology letter will be released each year, written in alternating years by Treyarch and Infinity Ward.

“We already have these guys on an alternating schedule producing new Call of Duty games each year, so why not have them also work on our new yearly apology letters to employees?” Kotick asked in his letter. “It’s a very similar process to making Call of Duty, really. You don’t need to recreate the entire letter each time, you just need to work from the base created in the previous letter, updating some language to fit modern events and trends. They just have to make sure that they stick to the core theme of the apology letter series: that we’re very sorry, we investigated this ourselves and found no wrongdoing, and that we’re committed to some vague change in the future.”

In order to make sure that the apology letters stay true to the standards of Activision Blizzard, Kotick has given himself the role of Final Proofreader, a job that comes with a $50 million yearly salary.