Louie Aronowitz

Star Wars Porn Parody Changes Luke and Leia to Just Step Siblings

MONTREAL — Representatives from Brazzers have confirmed that their highly anticipated nine-part pornographic Star Wars parody series will modify the…

4 years ago

Guy at Front of Human Centipede Doesn’t Believe in ‘Privilege’

MUNICH — Tourist Rich Stanton, who recently awakened in a lab in Germany as the front of a human centipede,…

5 years ago

Tom Cruise Announces He Will Be Running in 2020

LOS ANGELES — Tom Cruise released a statement today, after much speculation, confirming he would be running in the year…

5 years ago

Democrats Enlist HQ Host Scott Rogowsky to Filibuster Supreme Court Nominee

WASHINGTON — Democratic leaders have brought in Scott Rogowsky, host of HQ Trivia, to aid in the filibuster of Supreme…

6 years ago

Breaking: You Just Lost The Game

NEW YORK — New reports are coming in that reveal that you, as a result of reading this very article…

6 years ago

Star Wars Themed Wedding Not Following Canon

SCARSDALE, N.Y. — Guests in attendance at Dan and Beth Miller’s Star Wars themed wedding were outraged to find it…

6 years ago

All Female ‘Lord of the Flies’ Remake Somehow Still Fails Bechdel Test

LOS ANGELES — A leaked script of the just announced The Lord Of The Flies reboot revealed that, despite starring…

7 years ago