March 7, 2020 Exhausted ‘Slay the Spire’ Fans Demand Developers Make Game Less Fun Exhausted ‘Slay the Spire’ Fans Demand Developers Make Game Less Fun NEW YORK — Emphasizing the fact that they really ought to start playing some other games that they’ve been meaning to get around to, a…
February 13, 2020 Gamers Reflect On E3’s Humble Beginnings as Trade Show Designed to Help Huge Corporations Sell More Video Games Gamers Reflect On E3’s Humble Beginnings as Trade Show Designed to Help Huge Corporations Sell More Video Games LOS ANGELES — With big names like Geoff Keighley and PlayStation dropping out of this year’s iteration of E3, gamers around the world have been…
February 1, 2020 Open World Game Praised for Realistic Weather Effects That Give You Seasonal Depression Open World Game Praised for Realistic Weather Effects That Give You Seasonal Depression MINNEAPOLIS — Praising the deep, emotional impact it leaves on the player, gamers are giving rave reviews to the newly released open-world video game Somber…
January 15, 2020 Tragic: The Computer Server From Black Mirror’s San Junipero Is Down for Scheduled Maintenance Tragic: The Computer Server From Black Mirror’s San Junipero Is Down for Scheduled Maintenance SANTA ROSA, Calif. — Sadly leaving all of the service’s customers unavailable to access the popular massively multiplayer online game until 8:00 AM PST tomorrow…
January 7, 2020 Game Freak Confirms That Pokéball is Short for ‘Pocket Ball’ Game Freak Confirms That Pokéball is Short for ‘Pocket Ball’ TOKYO — Putting years of speculation by the Pokémon fan community to rest, Game Freak team lead Shigeru Ohmori confirmed to members of the press…
January 6, 2020 Unhinged Maniac Rigs NES to Explode If SMB3 Speedrunner Lets Mario Drop Below P-Speed Unhinged Maniac Rigs NES to Explode If SMB3 Speedrunner Lets Mario Drop Below P-Speed ORLANDO, Fla. — Sending waves of terror rippling throughout the streamer’s Twitch chat, an unhinged maniac rigged an NES to explode if Super Mario Bros.…
December 25, 2019 Merry PISSmas, Shitbird! It’s Time to Kick Ass and Spread Cheer, and I’m All Out of Cheer Merry PISSmas, Shitbird! It’s Time to Kick Ass and Spread Cheer, and I’m All Out of Cheer Ho-ho-hail to the king, baby! It’s me, God’s gift to women, Duke Nukem, here to wish you season’s greetings…or at least, that was the plan,…
December 22, 2019 Con Attendee Regretting Death Stranding Cosplay Con Attendee Regretting Death Stranding Cosplay BROOKLYN, N.Y. — With a visibly pained expression on his face and his body seemingly on the verge of collapse, local con attendee Derek Christensen…
December 13, 2019 Twin Galaxies Removes George Costanza’s Frogger High Score From Leaderboard After Discovering It Was Faked Twin Galaxies Removes George Costanza’s Frogger High Score From Leaderboard After Discovering It Was Faked OTTUMWA, Iowa — Calling the circumstance a highly regrettable error and promising that they will increase the thoroughness of their research in the future, video…
