November 22, 2020 Man Worried He’ll Never Find Open World Game as Good as Her Man Worried He’ll Never Find Open World Game as Good as Her ROCHESTER, N.Y. — Local gamer Joe Fleming is reportedly worried that Nintendo’s stunning masterpiece Breath of the Wild has ruined any chance that he’ll ever…
November 14, 2020 Size Queen Purchases PS5 Size Queen Purchases PS5 NEW YORK — Local size queen Sasha Carter reportedly purchased a PlayStation 5, the only console large enough to satisfy her need for an enormous…
November 9, 2020 Review: ‘Assassin’s Creed Valhalla’ Brilliantly Uses Viking Lore to Tell a Story of Fatherh—OK I’m Realizing Now I’m Playing ‘God of War’ Review: ‘Assassin’s Creed Valhalla’ Brilliantly Uses Viking Lore to Tell a Story of Fatherh—OK I’m Realizing Now I’m Playing ‘God of War’ Assassin’s Creed Valhalla, Ubisoft’s brilliant new adventure in gaming that lets you take on the life of a powerful viking, traveling through Norse mythology all…
November 7, 2020 Editorial: If You Think About It, All This Is Like Video Games, Really Editorial: If You Think About It, All This Is Like Video Games, Really There are a lot of crazy things going on in the world these days. Biden has defeated Trump in the 2020 presidential election, there’s a…
November 7, 2020 Republicans Try to Decipher “Haha Just Chillin” After QAnon Accidentally Posts on Wrong Account Republicans Try to Decipher “Haha Just Chillin” After QAnon Accidentally Posts on Wrong Account WASHINGTON — Republicans nationwide are struggling to decipher a cryptic message from Q, the anonymous leader of conspiracy theory QAnon, after they accidentally posted “haha…
November 7, 2020 Loving Couple Looking to Adopt New TV Show Loving Couple Looking to Adopt New TV Show ANCHORAGE, Ala. — Local couple Alice and Mark Holland are reportedly looking to adopt a new television, bringing it into a home filled with love,…
November 3, 2020 Jeffrey Toobin Announces He Failed ‘No Nut November’ Jeffrey Toobin Announces He Failed ‘No Nut November’ NEW YORK — New Yorker reporter Jeffrey Toobin announced on social media today that he failed the viral internet challenge to not ejaculate during the…
November 3, 2020 Guy Writing In “Waluigi” for President Doesn’t Actually Want Waluigi to Be President Guy Writing In “Waluigi” for President Doesn’t Actually Want Waluigi to Be President ROCHESTER, N.Y. — Local voter Martin Frost does not actually want video game character Waluigi to be president, despite writing him in under “president” on…
October 28, 2020 Anonymous ‘Cyberpunk 2077’ Contractor Reveals Intense Crunch Culture Made Him Say “Whoa” Anonymous ‘Cyberpunk 2077’ Contractor Reveals Intense Crunch Culture Made Him Say “Whoa” LOS ANGELES — An anonymous whistleblower working on Cyberpunk 2077 with CD Projekt Red has revealed a pattern of intense and abusive crunch culture that…
