Jeremy Kaplowitz

343 Refuses to Reveal What Master Chief’s Suit Does With All the Cum

REDMOND, Wash. — Halo Infinite developers 343 Industries have refused to reveal what Master Chief’s armor does with all the…

3 years ago

Review: Pokémon Brilliant Diamond and Shining Pearl are Pokémon Games. Not Really Sure What You Expected Here, To Be Honest

Pokémon Brilliant Diamond and Shining Pearl — modern remakes of the Nintendo DS games Pokémon Diamond and Pearl — have…

3 years ago

Report: Lebron James’ Son Is Lead Developer on ‘MultiVersus’

BURBANK, Calif. — New reports about the upcoming Warner Brothers crossover platform fighting game has confirmed that the game is…

3 years ago

Activision Blizzard Announces They’re Changing Bobby Kotick’s Name

SANTA  MONICA, Calif. — Following various allegations and stories about CEO Bobby Kotick, Activision Blizzard has announced they are solving…

3 years ago

343 Announces Halo Infinite’s Tagline Will Be “Finish the Development”

REDMOND, Wash. — Surprise-releasing the beta for Halo Infinite multiplayer today, which appears to be the color blue in a…

3 years ago

Breadtuber Eaten by Birdtuber

LOS ANGELES — Local leftwing YouTuber Theodore Suarez, better known by his screen name The Explainanator, was tragically eaten by…

3 years ago

Celebrity Power Couple: Pete Davidson Was Just Spotted Holding Hands With the T-Shaped Tetromino From Tetris

Uh oh! Famously large-dicked bachelor Pete Davidson is tied up with another well known hottie according to some steamy photos…

3 years ago

Misspelled Password Entered Twice

LINCOLN, Neb. — Local internet user Beverley Todd unknowingly entered a misspelled version of her password while creating a Gmail…

3 years ago

Here’s All the SNL Porn Parodies Coming to LorneHub This Month

NBC has finally launched their hit new streaming service LorneHub, the only app exclusively for watching porn parodies of Saturday…

3 years ago