Jeremy Kaplowitz

Nation Comes Together In Time of Solidarity to Tolerate Playthrough of Jackbox Party Pack

WASHINGTON — Quarantined citizens around the country have reportedly come together in solidarity to tolerate playthroughs of various Jackbox Party…

5 years ago

Conan O’Brien Releases Yet Another Chapter in Despicable Anti-Gamer Propaganda Series

LOS ANGELES — Comedian and talk show host Conan O’Brien has released another episode of his Clueless Gamer series, opening…

5 years ago

J.J. Abrams Retcons Rian Johnson’s Name to ‘Ryan’

LOS ANGELES — J.J. Abrams has collaborated with authors on a new novelization of Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker…

5 years ago

We Forced People at Comic Con to Look at Sonic Porn (And It Backfired)

Written by Jeremy Kaplowitz, Giovanni Colantonio, Liam O'Malley, and Jeremy Hammond. Edited by Jeremy Kaplowitz Filmed by Giovanni Colantonio Starring…

5 years ago

Donald Trump Insists He Found Mew Under Truck in Pokémon Red

WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump is being attacked by prominent Democrats today after he claimed he found Mew under a…

5 years ago

Police Manhunt Underway for Man Who Didn’t Pay for WinRAR License After 40 Day Trial

FRESNO, Calif. — New police helicopter video shows the massive response to accused WinRAR License thief Michael Ramsey as fifteen…

5 years ago

Dr. Mario Stitches Up Three Goombas in Stack for Horrifying ‘Goomba-Centipede’ Experiment

MUSHROOM KINGDOM — The perverted Dr. Mario has disgraced the medical community once again after stitching together three goomba victims…

5 years ago

CDC Puts Temporary Ban on Playing Assassin’s Creed II

WASHINGTON — The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention has placed a temporary ban on playing the game Assassin’s Creed…

5 years ago

Throwaway Reddit Account Does Nothing to Obscure User’s Identity

MONTGOMERY, Ala. — Justin Curry’s post on Reddit’s r/relationship_advice under the username u/throwawaythekeys92 did absolutely nothing to hide his identity…

5 years ago