Jeremy Kaplowitz

Bernie Sanders Receives Mysterious Letter

BURLINGTON, Vt. — Senator Bernie Sanders has reportedly received a mysterious white letter with a red seal less than a…

5 years ago

Video Game for Gamers by Gamers

LOS ANGELES — A new video game is in production by a group of gamers and is intended to appeal…

5 years ago

Gamer Spices Up Resume With ‘Spends Hours Daily Solving Puzzles, Cooperating With Teammates, and Clearing Objectives’

SACRAMENTO, Calif. — Local gamer Kayla Stephenson reportedly included various video game skills on a job resume in an attempt…

5 years ago

Man Shocked to Discover Girlfriend Entirely CGI After Watching VFX Breakdown

FORT WAYNE, Ind. — Local boyfriend Steven Owen was shocked to discover that his girlfriend of three years was entirely…

5 years ago

So-Called Resident Doesn’t Even Have DIY Recipes to Offer

NEW YORK — Local apartment resident Milo, a 4-year old house cat, reportedly has no DIY recipes to offer his…

5 years ago

Hackers Leak White House Plans for Great Depression Definitive Edition

WASHINGTON — An anonymous source has datamined the United States government and leaked what appears to be future plans for…

5 years ago

Opinion: Hideo Kojima’s Next Game Must Be About Nice World Where Nothing Bad Happens

As we trudge along through these desperate times, when the horrors of our lives were so accurately predicted in the…

5 years ago

Opinion: The Only Way to Defeat Sauron is to Let Him Take Over Your Body and Rule Your City

Let me start this off by saying that I despise Sauron as much as the rest of you. Sauron is…

5 years ago

Opinion: Dragon Ball Z Is Turn-Based Fighting Show

As television becomes more fractured and confusing in the new decade, it’s important to take a step back and recategorize…

5 years ago