Jeremy Kaplowitz

Disney Announces Fuck It, They’re Just Gonna Make ‘A New Hope’ Third Time

LOS ANGELES — Following low viewership for its series The Book of Boba Fett, Disney announced today that they’re just…

2 years ago

New Pokémon Game Just Gonna Assume You Need an Hour or So of Text to Learn What Pokémon Is

TOKYO — Newly released Pokémon game Pokémon Legends: Arceus figures you need a good hour or two of soundless text…

2 years ago

Random! This Video Game Company Happens to Be Completely Restructuring Right After Employees Started Unionizing

OK so this is so freaking random! Apparently video game developers SuperTech, creators of the massively popular Guns Out! franchise,…

2 years ago

Despicable: This NYC Man, West Elm Caleb, Is Dating New Girl Every Week

The women of the popular dancing children app TikTok have lit up this week, after realizing that nearly every one…

2 years ago

Joss Whedon Fails to Explain Controversy to His Girlfriend After Realizing ‘Buffy’ Came Out Before She Was Born

LOS ANGELES — Writer and director Joss Whedon, while struggling to explain to his 22-year-old girlfriend today why people were…

2 years ago

Entirety of ‘Smiling Friends’ Now Streaming on YouTube in 15-Second Stolen Clips

ATLANTA — Season one of Adult Swim’s new comedy show Smiling Friends has released in its entirety on both Adult…

2 years ago

I Touched Every Blade of Grass in ‘Breath of the Wild’ and Learned I Need to Make Increasingly Complicated Video Game Content In Order to Feel Anything Anymore

If you’re familiar with my work or video game content in general, you know that I love to go to…

2 years ago

Wordle Fans Concerned After Answers Spell Out “Noble Truth: Steve Warns About Angry Enemy. Users Ought Bring Flame Among House”

NEW YORK — Fans of the viral online spelling phenomenon Wordle have grown concerned after the consecutive 5-letter words seemed…

2 years ago

Anita Sarkeesian Criticizes Gay Porn for Lack of Female Representation

LOS ANGELES — Feminist Frequency founder Anita Sarkeesian wrote a critical review of a recent gay porn video, citing the…

2 years ago