James Webster

James Webster

Datamine Reveals ‘Bloodborne’ Nurses a Seething Hatred for You SpecificallyDatamine Reveals ‘Bloodborne’ Nurses a Seething Hatred for You Specifically

Datamine Reveals ‘Bloodborne’ Nurses Seething Hatred for You Specifically

NEW YORK — Hackers researching the internal files of cult hit action-RPG Bloodborne have made a startling and unprecedented discovery:…

3 years ago
Backyard Baseball Season Called Off After Pablo Tests Positive for COVID-19Backyard Baseball Season Called Off After Pablo Tests Positive for COVID-19

Backyard Baseball Season Called Off After Pablo Tests Positive for COVID-19

ERNIE’S HOUSE — A positive COVID test for league superstar Pablo Sanchez has resulted in the entire 2021-22 Backyard Baseball…

4 years ago
New JK Rowling Novel Written Entirely in 4chan GreentextNew JK Rowling Novel Written Entirely in 4chan Greentext

New JK Rowling Novel Written Entirely in 4chan Greentext

LONDON — Best-selling author JK Rowling announced today that her new novel Troubled Blood will be published anonymously, written entirely…

4 years ago
CDC Recommends All Americans Keep Audio Logs During Pandemic for Future Protagonists to Stumble UponCDC Recommends All Americans Keep Audio Logs During Pandemic for Future Protagonists to Stumble Upon

CDC Recommends All Americans Keep Audio Logs During Pandemic for Future Protagonists to Stumble Upon

WASHINGTON — At a press conference this afternoon, CDC Director Robert Redfield urged all American citizens to begin keeping audio…

5 years ago
Tragic: Distant Aliens Just Now Receiving Radio Waves of Bad Simpsons EpisodesTragic: Distant Aliens Just Now Receiving Radio Waves of Bad Simpsons Episodes

Tragic: Distant Aliens Just Now Receiving Radio Waves of Bad Simpsons Episodes

WASHINGTON — Astrophysicists from the NASA confirmed that radio waves of the bad The Simpsons seasons are beginning to reach…

6 years ago
Hard Drive Patch 1.4.0. ReleasedHard Drive Patch 1.4.0. Released

Hard Drive Patch 1.4.0. Released

Hello everyone, and welcome to Hard Drive, Version 1.4.0.! First of all, we would like to thank everyone for enjoying…

6 years ago