Ian Kitchen

Nintendo Gearing up for Holiday Season by Destroying Any Remaining Stock

KYOTO, Japan — Nintendo is preparing for the upcoming holiday season by making sure every remaining game and console are destroyed,…

7 years ago

Tony Hawk Undergoes Dangerous Skin Pixelation Surgery to Become More Recognizable

ENCINITAS, Calif. — Pro skateboarder Tony Hawk has reportedly had every inch of his body surgically pixelated in an attempt…

7 years ago

LEAKED EMAILS: Solid Snake Confided in Aides He Has No Idea What’s Going on Anymore

SHADOW MOSES ISLAND, Alaska — Classified emails intercepted by hackers today reveal Solid Snake to be completely and utterly lost…

7 years ago