January 19, 2020 Game Critic Describes New Stapler as ‘Positively Oozing With Charm’ Game Critic Describes New Stapler as ‘Positively Oozing With Charm’ SAN FRANCISCO — IGN game critic Michael Sherman has reportedly cracked under the pressure of his job and issued a review of the stapler in…
October 29, 2019 Review: ‘Luigi’s Mansion 3’ Serves Up Spooky Scares If You’re a Fucking Idiot Review: ‘Luigi’s Mansion 3’ Serves Up Spooky Scares If You’re a Fucking Idiot Nintendo released Luigi’s Mansion 3 for Switch just in time for Halloween; too bad it’s not fucking scary at all, and was obviously made for…
September 25, 2019 Whistleblower Now in World 8 Whistleblower Now in World 8 WASHINGTON — The whistleblower responsible for filing the complaint that President Donald Trump requested an investigation of Joe Biden from the President of Ukraine Volodymyr…
April 23, 2019 Brave: Pierce Brosnan Leaves House in DK Mode Brave: Pierce Brosnan Leaves House in DK Mode MALIBU, Calif. — In an act of radical body positivity being praised by fans online, James Bond actor Pierce Brosnan was photographed by paparazzi outside…
April 15, 2019 Nintendo Executes Reggie Fils-Aimé’s Mii in Standard Retirement Procedure Nintendo Executes Reggie Fils-Aimé’s Mii in Standard Retirement Procedure REDMOND, Wash. — Reggie Fils-Aimé has made his final tearful goodbye from Nintendo after 16 years today, and as part of the severance process, his…
March 29, 2019 Man Arrested for Comic Mischief Man Arrested for Comic Mischief BUFFALO, N.Y. — After a night of allegedly bawdy behavior, Jason “Buzzly” Godrich was detained early this morning by Buffalo police on the charge of…
November 21, 2018 Nintendo Lets Terminally Ill Fan Work 14 Hour Days Coding New Game Nintendo Lets Terminally Ill Fan Work 14 Hour Days Coding New Game KYOTO, Japan — In an incredibly gracious move, Nintendo has granted a terminally ill fan’s last wish of appearing in a game by allowing him…
August 8, 2018 Lonely Man Speedruns Calzone Lonely Man Speedruns Calzone BROOKLYN, N.Y. — Displaying remarkable skill and reflexes, Brett Echelson livestreamed a complete speedrun of a calzone from his neighborhood pizzeria last night, setting a…
March 17, 2018 Water in Shitty New Game Looks Beautiful Water in Shitty New Game Looks Beautiful AUSTIN — Early reviews are indicating that “Adventures of Slappy,” a newly released action/adventure game, has horrible controls, ugly characters, a confusing story, and stunningly…
