Giovanni Colantonio

30-Year Old Gamer Puts Fake Birthday Into Steam’s Age Verification Anyways

CHERRY HILL, N.J. — 30-year-old gamer Anna Gaskins reportedly entered a fake birthday into Steam’s age verification system, despite actually…

4 years ago

Can You Violate the Geneva Conventions in Mario Kart DS, Kingdom Hearts 2, and Call of Duty: Advanced Warfare?

One of the earliest known (emphasis on ‘known’ here) cases of the United States committing war atrocities was around 1898.…

4 years ago

Millennial Excited to Return to Pokémon Snap With Photography Degree Under His Belt

CAMBRIDGE, Mass. — A millennial gamer who grew up with Pokémon Snap is excited to play the new Nintendo Switch…

5 years ago

‘Abrams Cut’ of The Last Jedi Spends Extra 30 Minutes Revealing Who Every Porgs’ Dad Is

LOS ANGELES — Disney surprise announced a “JJ Abrams Cut” of Star Wars: The Last Jedi this morning which they…

5 years ago

Can You Violate the Geneva Conventions in Minesweeper, Tonight We Riot, and Plants Vs Zombies?

If you find yourself “disgusted” by the riots happening in America over racial injustice, wait until you hear about the…

5 years ago

Sony Clarifies That ‘Spider-Man: Miles Morales’ Is Separate, But Equal Game

SAN MATEO, Calif. — Following fan confusion over whether or not Spider-Man: Miles Morales is a standalone game, Sony executives…

5 years ago

Can You Violate the Geneva Conventions in Grand Theft Auto Online, Fruit Ninja, and Putt-Putt Saves The Zoo?

Despite the fact that we have extensive war rules like the Geneva Conventions, countries still boldly violate these standards when…

5 years ago

Casual Fans at Mario Orchestra Concert Rudely Talking During Dire, Dire Docks

SYDNEY — A group of casual Mario fans annoyed fellow concertgoers at an orchestral show celebrating the franchise’s history, as…

5 years ago

Can You Violate the Geneva Conventions in Halo 3, Horizon Zero Dawn, and Pac-Man?

South Korea, 1950: U.S. soldiers kill an undetermined amount of refugees on a railroad bridge southeast of Seoul. Rather than…

5 years ago