Eric Bailey

Eric Bailey

Mattress Store Offers Discount on Your Next Podcast SubscriptionMattress Store Offers Discount on Your Next Podcast Subscription

Mattress Store Offers Discount on Your Next Podcast Subscription

TINLEY PARK, Ill. — In an effort to drive more business from consumers who listen to lots of mattress advertisements…

4 years ago
‘Ship of Theseus’ DLC Changes So Much About Sea of Thieves That It Might Not Even Be the Same Game Anymore‘Ship of Theseus’ DLC Changes So Much About Sea of Thieves That It Might Not Even Be the Same Game Anymore

‘Ship of Theseus’ DLC Changes So Much About Sea of Thieves That It Might Not Even Be the Same Game Anymore

TWYCROSS, England — Over the last week, Sea of Thieves developer Rare released a new “Ship of Theseus” DLC that…

5 years ago
Nintendo Executive Solemnly Reports Last N64 at Shitty McDonald’s Has Finally Stopped WorkingNintendo Executive Solemnly Reports Last N64 at Shitty McDonald’s Has Finally Stopped Working

Nintendo Executive Solemnly Reports Last N64 at Shitty McDonald’s Has Finally Stopped Working

KANKAKEE, Ill. — In a mid-afternoon press conference, Nintendo of America President Doug Bowser confirmed that the last Nintendo 64…

6 years ago
Gamer Mystified by Tinder’s Lack of Dialogue OptionsGamer Mystified by Tinder’s Lack of Dialogue Options

Gamer Mystified by Tinder’s Lack of Dialogue Options

SAN PEDRO, Calif. — Complaining that the app advertised an intricate choice-based system promising branching plotlines depending on the player’s…

6 years ago
Tolkien Biopic to Be Split Into, I Dunno, Six FilmsTolkien Biopic to Be Split Into, I Dunno, Six Films

Tolkien Biopic to Be Split Into, I Dunno, Six Films

HOLLYWOOD, Calif. — Executives at Fox Searchlight Pictures have revealed that the upcoming biographical film Tolkien, based on the life…

6 years ago
Blizzard Gives Employees Box With 8.3% Chance of Containing Pink SlipBlizzard Gives Employees Box With 8.3% Chance of Containing Pink Slip

Blizzard Gives Employees Box With 8.3% Chance of Containing Pink Slip

IRVINE, Calif. — After a recent earnings report announced record revenue, Activision-Blizzard initiated layoffs by handing out boxes to its…

6 years ago