Ed Smith

Organizers of Martial Arts Tournament Didn’t Say Anything About Fucking Bear

TOKYO — A former MMA champion officially withdrew from an international martial arts competition yesterday after a brutal mauling from…

4 years ago

Next Kingdom Hearts Game to Feature all the Racist Cats from ‘The Aristocats’

TOKYO — In honor of the classic Disney film’s 50th anniversary, publisher Square-Enix announced in a press release today that…

4 years ago

Twitter User Cancels 20 Others Before Turning the Cancel on Himself

LOS ANGELES — Local Twitter user Frederick Peterson, better known by his handle @freddiepeteyboy682, went on a tragic cancel spree…

4 years ago

Vast, Empty Field Elects New Mayor

NEWCITY02 — Voters have apparently grown tired of living in a featureless meadow, as a first-time runner has secured a…

4 years ago