September 20, 2021 These Pen Pals Have Been Playing Mortal Kombat Turn-by-Turn via Mail Since 1993 These Pen Pals Have Been Playing Mortal Kombat Turn-by-Turn via Mail Since 1993 NAPERVILLE, Ill. — Long-distance friends Milton Schmidt and Clayton Houston have been playing the same match of the video game Mortal Kombat for almost thirty…
September 20, 2021 Genius Janitor at Marvel Solves Formula for Next Movie Genius Janitor at Marvel Solves Formula for Next Movie BURBANK, Calif. — Mild-mannered janitor Carl Perry has done what some believe to be impossible, by solving the formula for an upcoming Marvel movie that…
March 24, 2021 Professor X Unsure What to Do With Mutant Whose Only Power Is Knowing When a Bob Seger Song Is Playing on Any Classic Rock Radio Station in America Professor X Unsure What to Do With Mutant Whose Only Power Is Knowing When a Bob Seger Song Is Playing on Any Classic Rock Radio Station in America NORTH SALEM, N.Y. — Professor Charles Xavier, headmaster at Charles Xavier’s School for Gifted Youngsters, is reportedly at a loss as to how to utilize…
January 21, 2021 Deluxe Edition of Board Game Includes Four Friends Willing to Play and Not Bitch the Whole Time Deluxe Edition of Board Game Includes Four Friends Willing to Play and Not Bitch the Whole Time LOS ALTOS, Calif. — Astral Plane Games, publisher of the popular worker placement board game Solis Occasum, has released a deluxe edition of the game…
January 7, 2021 Facebook-Banned Trump Livid He Can’t Log Into Oculus Facebook-Banned Trump Livid He Can’t Log Into Oculus WASHINGTON — Only a few hours after being banned on Facebook, President Donald Trump erupted in anger when he realized that he was no longer…
December 24, 2020 Police Search for Body of Dad Who Put Socks in Empty PS5 Box as Gag Christmas Present Police Search for Body of Dad Who Put Socks in Empty PS5 Box as Gag Christmas Present WHEATON, Ill. — Local and state authorities are in a desperate search for a local father who jokingly put socks in an empty PlayStation 5…
November 5, 2020 Ryan Reynolds Swears He Has No Memory of Holding Up Novelty T-Shirt in Facebook Ad Ryan Reynolds Swears He Has No Memory of Holding Up Novelty T-Shirt in Facebook Ad LOS ANGELES — Actor Ryan Renolds was reportedly worried about his mental health when he came across a photo of him on social media holding…
October 10, 2020 Kids With Two Living Parents Demand Representation in Disney Films Kids With Two Living Parents Demand Representation in Disney Films BURBANK, Cali. — A protest was held outside Disney headquarters earlier this week by the organization Kids of Two Loving Parents (KoTLP) demanding that the…
September 1, 2020 Report: Shields May Be as Low as 30% Report: Shields May Be as Low as 30% THE GHOST NEBULA — While battling the warrior race, The Zardecks, experts on the Spaceship Baychimo, warn that the ship’s shields have dropped to 30%…
