Charles E.P. Murphy

Freddy Krueger Getting Real Freaked Out By Evangelion Fan’s Dreams

SPRINGWOOD, Ohio — Paranormal teen-killer Freddy Krueger is feeling totally freaked out while trying to haunt a Neon Genesis Evangelion…

5 years ago

Embarrassment Ensues at Police Halloween Party Where Everyone Showed Up as the Punisher

ONEONTA, Ala. — A social faux pas was committed at the annual Blount County Police Halloween Ball after every single…

5 years ago

Monster Attack Leaves 37 Dead, 120 Homeless, 1 Power Ranger Having Learned Valuable Lesson About Peer Pressure

ANGEL GROVE, Calif. — The Levy Heights massacre, in which a half-boar half-clown monster called Piggly Giggly destroyed dozens of…

5 years ago

Is This New Fighting Game the Next Street Fighter? No.

After three years and five missed deadlines, Stomp Head Gaming’s much-hyped kickstarter game Schoolyard Head Stompers is out. This game…

6 years ago

Hey, Wanna See Some Nazi Shit?

Oh, you want to watch a Doctor Who trailer? Your Google history tells us you enjoy opinions on Doctor Who.…

6 years ago

Final Boss Paid 35 Times More Than Level 1 Minion

MUSHROOM KINGDOM — A new study on wage distributions in Mushroom Kingdom by University of Toad Town has found the…

7 years ago

Retrospective: Tiger Electronics and Your Family’s Brutal Failure to Climb Into Middle Class

  For fifteen years, Tiger Electronics’ handheld games dominated the market as a cheap alternative to real games for impoverished…

7 years ago

Valve Hires George R.R. Martin to Begin Writing Half-Life 3

SANTE FE, N.M. — A Song of Fire and Ice writer George R.R. Martin was hired by Valve today to…

7 years ago