Andy Holt

Developers Reveal Mashing Buttons Really Does Make It Load Faster

LOS ANGELES — Major game studios have confirmed that clicking the buttons on the controller really will reduce the load…

3 years ago

Gamer Insists PS5 He Doesn’t Have Is Better Than Xbox Series X He Also Doesn’t Have

COLUMBIA, S.C. — In a recent online argument, local gamer Max Anderson was adamant that the PS5 was “far and…

3 years ago

Phil Spencer Comes Home to Giant Xbox He Lives In

SEATTLE — Microsoft executive Phil Spencer commuted home last night to the gigantic Xbox Series X where he resides with…

3 years ago

Arya Stark Unbeatable in MultiVersus Due to Devastating “Sneak Up Out of Nowhere Somehow” Attack

BURBANK, Calif. — Warner Bros has confirmed that the character of Arya Stark will be essentially impossible to defeat in…

3 years ago

NBA Preemptively Adds Rule That Says Furries Can’t Play Basketball

NEW YORK — To get ahead of any confusion stemming from the Air Bud franchise, the NBA has issued a…

3 years ago

Gal Gadot Demands Evil Queen Be Renamed “Queen Acting in Self Defense”

LOS ANGELES — Before signing on to play the Evil Queen in Snow White, Gal Gadot insisted that Disney rename…

3 years ago

Gamer Unsure If This Is Going to Be “Pause” Bowel Movement or a “Log Off” Bowel Movement

TAMPA, Fla. — Local gamer Daniel Zapata didn’t know if an upcoming bathroom trip would be serious enough to log…

3 years ago

Writer Leaks Details of Upcoming Movie

MADISON, Wisc. — Popular fantasy novelist Hannah Crimp faced controversy this week after writing down the plot details of an…

3 years ago

Netflix Admits 90% of Menu Tiles Lead Nowhere

LOS GATOS, Calif. — Netflix was forced to confirm that roughly 90% of the menu tiles in their app have…

3 years ago