Adam Martin

Dark Tower Multiverse Technically Allows for World Where Film Adaptation Is Good

OXFORD, England — Devoted fans of Stephen King’s The Dark Tower series have hypothesized that the multiverse contained in the…

5 years ago

Man Anxiously Waiting for HQ Trivia to Start So He Can Type “TRUMP” in Chat

KNOXVILLE, Tenn. — Larry Pullman, 37, is anticipating this afternoon’s HQ Trivia game in which he plans to type “TRUMP”…

7 years ago

Fortnite Mobile Game Eliminates All Other Apps From Phone, Claims Victory Royale

CARY, N.C. — Epic Games’ popular battle royale shooter Fortnite, now available as a mobile game, has successfully removed all…

7 years ago

TV Show’s Lifeless Corpse Continues to Limp Along Years After Death

ATLANTA — AMC’s “The Walking Dead” has scientists perplexed by its ability to continue airing, despite their observations that the…

7 years ago

Twitch Streamer Banned for Exposing Noobs

SAN FRANCISCO — Twitch banned user FragDoll today for exposing noobs on her channel, according to lead community manager Aureylian,…

7 years ago

Burglar Steals Everything But Wii U

BIRMINGHAM, Ala. — A local burglar, after stealing hundreds of dollars worth of assorted pieces of technology, specifically decided not…

7 years ago

Alabama Senate Candidate Roy Moore Pledges to Make America Backwards Compatible

MONTGOMERY, Ala. — Roy Moore promised to bring his values to Washington by making the nation backwards compatible during a…

7 years ago