Castlevania Millennial Worried They Will Never Own a House With a Second Upside Down House Under ItCastlevania Millennial Worried They Will Never Own a House With a Second Upside Down House Under It

Castlevania Millennial Worried They Will Never Own House With a Second Upside Down House Under It

WALLACHIA, Romania — Local millennial Daniel Balan, 32, is reportedly fed up with the state of the world and worries…

3 years ago
Xavier’s School For Gifted Youngsters Denies Application From Girl Who Claims to Be Mutant-Level EmpathXavier’s School For Gifted Youngsters Denies Application From Girl Who Claims to Be Mutant-Level Empath

Xavier’s School For Gifted Youngsters Denies Application From Girl Who Claims to Be Mutant-Level Empath

ATHENS, Ga. — Local teen Ashlyn Parker was rejected from Xavier’s School for Gifted Youngsters on the basis that she…

3 years ago
Rockstar Updates Red Dead Online to Include Tumbleweeds Blowing Through Abandoned ServersRockstar Updates Red Dead Online to Include Tumbleweeds Blowing Through Abandoned Servers

Rockstar Updates Red Dead Online to Include Tumbleweeds Blowing Through Abandoned Servers

NEW YORK — Rockstar Games has answered fans’ pleas and finally made a substantial addition to its Red Dead Online…

3 years ago
Microsoft Could Straight Up Buy Sony, By the WayMicrosoft Could Straight Up Buy Sony, By the Way

Microsoft Could Straight Up Buy Sony, By the Way

Microsoft is buying Activision Blizzard for nearly $70 billion. If you subscribe to the Wall Street Journal, you can read…

3 years ago
Here’s All The Newest Workplace Abuses Coming to Game Pass This MonthHere’s All The Newest Workplace Abuses Coming to Game Pass This Month

Here’s All The Newest Workplace Abuses Coming to Game Pass This Month

Microsoft is always expanding its lineup of fan-favorites on Game Pass, and this month is shaping up to be no…

3 years ago
Joss Whedon Fails to Explain Controversy to His Girlfriend After Realizing ‘Buffy’ Came Out Before She Was BornJoss Whedon Fails to Explain Controversy to His Girlfriend After Realizing ‘Buffy’ Came Out Before She Was Born

Joss Whedon Fails to Explain Controversy to His Girlfriend After Realizing ‘Buffy’ Came Out Before She Was Born

LOS ANGELES — Writer and director Joss Whedon, while struggling to explain to his 22-year-old girlfriend today why people were…

3 years ago
“Our New Cheeseburger Highkey Slaps. Poggers!” Tweets One of America’s Most Powerful Corporations“Our New Cheeseburger Highkey Slaps. Poggers!” Tweets One of America’s Most Powerful Corporations

“Our New Cheeseburger Highkey Slaps. Poggers!” Tweets One of America’s Most Powerful Corporations

CHICAGO — Fast food restaurant and megacorporation McDonald’s made a tweet Tuesday claiming their new bacon quarter pounder ‘highkey slaps’…

3 years ago
Employees Urged to Keep Working After T-Virus Exposure Unless They Have Giant Eyeball Growing Out of Their ShoulderEmployees Urged to Keep Working After T-Virus Exposure Unless They Have Giant Eyeball Growing Out of Their Shoulder

Employees Urged to Keep Working After T-Virus Exposure Unless They Have Giant Eyeball Growing Out of Their Shoulder

RACCOON CITY — The Raccoon City Health Department (RCHD) recently advised employees exposed to the rapidly spreading T-Virus to continue…

3 years ago
Phineas & Ferb Co-Creator Falls for Obvious Satirical JokePhineas & Ferb Co-Creator Falls for Obvious Satirical Joke

Phineas & Ferb Co-Creator Falls for Obvious Satirical Joke

On January 15th, beloved* satirical nerd-culture outlet Hard Drive published an article titled Creators of Confirm Phineas & Ferb Could…

3 years ago
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