Team Rocket Mortified as Teleporter Pad Fuses Child With Butterfree

SAFFRON CITY, Kanto — Members of notorious crime syndicate Team Rocket were horrified to discover that a small child who…

3 years ago

Activision Blizzard Wins Game Award for Best Ongoing Scandal

LOS ANGELES — Garnering a round of enthusiastic applause from the live audience at the Microsoft Theater, Geoff Keighley announced…

3 years ago

Complicated Puzzle in Game Tasks You With Pulling Out Your Phone and Looking it Up

LOS ANGELES — An intricate puzzle in the new adventure game Eternities in Atlantis tasks players with pausing the game…

3 years ago

Horny PC Tower Gets Turned On by Foot

NEW YORK — A sexually charged PC tower sitting on gamer Nicolas Mooney’s floor was reportedly turned on today by…

3 years ago

Opinion: Their Life Points are Low, There’s No Way They’re Coming Back!

Ha-ha! Tremble in fear at my formidable Duel Monsters skills, onlookers! It is I, Literally Any Fucking ‘Yu-Gi-Oh!’ Rival Character…

3 years ago

Developers Reveal Mashing Buttons Really Does Make It Load Faster

LOS ANGELES — Major game studios have confirmed that clicking the buttons on the controller really will reduce the load…

3 years ago

Crude Mountain Dew Reaches Highest Price in Decades

NEW YORK — Omicron, the latest coronavirus variant to dominate headlines, has struck devastating blows to several industries, including the…

3 years ago

Rockstar Announces They’ve Fixed GTA Trilogy by Adding Microtransactions

NEW YORK — Rockstar Games publicly declared their remastered Grand Theft Auto Trilogy as being “fully fixed” today after adding…

3 years ago

Fans of Dark Souls Will Love This: They Made Dark Souls 2

Calling all Dark Souls fans! You’ll want to sit down for this: we have uncovered a huge announcement regarding the…

3 years ago