July 14, 2020 ‘Mass Effect’ Fan Skeptical That Their Choice in Presidential Election Will Influence Ending ‘Mass Effect’ Fan Skeptical That Their Choice in Presidential Election Will Influence Ending RIVERTON, Wyo. — Avid Mass Effect fan Martin Shore plans to opt out of voting in the upcoming 2020 presidential election, citing skepticism that his…
July 9, 2020 Termina Resident Convinced Giant, Ominous Moon a Liberal Hoax Termina Resident Convinced Giant, Ominous Moon a Liberal Hoax CLOCK TOWN — A Termina citizen took to the streets yesterday to denounce the large, ominous moon inching ever closer to the city as “a…
June 26, 2020 Nancy Pelosi Plays Single Match as Doomfist in Honor of Black Lives Matter Nancy Pelosi Plays Single Match as Doomfist in Honor of Black Lives Matter WASHINGTON — Nancy Pelosi played a match of Overwatch as the black character Doomfist earlier this morning to celebrate Black Lives Matter. “Black Live Matters…
June 11, 2020 Opinion: Gaming Is Labor, and It Is Being Exploited Opinion: Gaming Is Labor, and It Is Being Exploited Leftist ideas are becoming mainstream in America, but many workers are still forgotten. I am here to advocate for perhaps the most forgotten of all.…
June 8, 2020 AOC Grafts Gun Onto Arm, Demands You Hear the Planet’s Cries of Pain AOC Grafts Gun Onto Arm, Demands You Hear the Planet’s Cries of Pain NEW YORK, N.Y. — Gesturing wildly with the large machine gun that had been recently surgically grafted onto her right arm, U.S. Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez…
June 7, 2020 It’s Time for the First Ever Pacifist Run of America It’s Time for the First Ever Pacifist Run of America America is the Dark Souls of countries. We live in a brutally challenging world that punishes people for the smallest mistakes — and sometimes without…
June 6, 2020 Parental Warning: Look Out for These Dangerous Fantasy Books Your Kids Might Be Reading Parental Warning: Look Out for These Dangerous Fantasy Books Your Kids Might Be Reading While concerned parents continue to wage war on violent video games, they are ignoring a much more serious danger: explicit fantasy novels that have found…
May 26, 2020 Dead by Daylight DLC Adds Iconic ‘80s Monster Ronald Reagan Dead by Daylight DLC Adds Iconic ‘80s Monster Ronald Reagan MONTREAL — Developer Behaviour Interactive announced the next DLC pack for its horror game Dead by Daylight will expand the game’s list of classic monsters by…
May 6, 2020 Gamers Donate Hundreds of Unused Healing Items to Ruth Bader Ginsburg Gamers Donate Hundreds of Unused Healing Items to Ruth Bader Ginsburg WASHINGTON — Gamers across America came together this week to donate hundreds of saved healing items to Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg, who was…
